I hope you're all having as good a weekend as possible. I'm sure - like me - you're all still in your feelings about everything that's happened. It's been difficult to settle back into a rhythm the last couple of days. Still, life is happening and needs to be dealt with. For me, that includes preparing to release my album and book finally. I started this journey almost 3 years ago now which seems crazy. The story of my EP is about the process of evolving. For me, that means going from feeling stuck in a painful cycle to realizing that change is possible and then doing the hard work to break free and grow. I wrote this because I have been working on myself for a long time, trying to identify the things that no longer serve me and removing them from my life so that I can become a better person.
When I was writing this album, there were a lot of conversations about the message and content of the songs. My producer told me then, that I would have to fully live the story I was writing; that is, that I would go through the growth cycle that I was writing about in its fullest form. Today, nearly 3 years after starting to write what would become this album - almost to the date of dad's diagnosis - I listened to the fully mastered and complete version of the album for the first time. And I cried. I cried because of the catharsis of course. But I also cried because, in a way, I just completed the growth cycle that I preemptively wrote about. I walked away from the experience of Dad's death with a sincere and deep connection with all of you. This album encapsulates, for me, the evolution of my relationship with all of you and subsequently with myself. For that reason, I wanted you to be the first people that I shared the entire album with, along with an explanation of what these songs represent. I hope you'll take 20 minutes to sit with the five songs in their entirety. I think this is the best portrait I could give of my emotional self to you. A self that was raised in our beautiful, dynamic family.
This song is about that moment when I realized that change is actually possible. It's about becoming friends with the darker spaces of myself in order to move past them. Rather than running away from things that I am scared of, it's about leaning into the fear in order to break free from it. To me, this corresponds to when I introduced Kyle to the family for the first time. I saw the potential in that meeting. Even though things didn't go as planned, I knew in that moment that change was possible.
“Spark” is an anthemic mid-tempo sparse in its arrangement yet beaming with emotion. The record pairs drum kit with lush, reverberated vocal coos, embodying the brightness and anticipation of its lyrics.
This song is the exhalation that comes after the dust settles and everything falls away. This is my most private moment of reflection. It is peace. In working to get to this point, I already realized that the "destination" I thought I was seeking - some pretty resolution and bookend to an experience - isn't real. This is no such thing as a "final destination," only accepting that life is an ongoing, cyclical journey that takes us from one moment to the next. There will always be a conflict to overcome or something else to work towards. The undercurrent is knowing that we do not have control over the external factors, only with how we chose to deal and move with them.
“Out” is a spacey and stripped guitar-lead ballad that captures Tennyson’s knack for nuance, with a light tap of the guitar body as the song’s sole percussive element. This is the EP’s lyrical and musical exhalation.
Skin (Live from Cascade Studios)
I appreciate you hearing me and my feelings out. This project has been such a huge part of my life for the last several years. This journey with Dad has been long and hard for all of us. In my processing, I see a lot of beauty in something that has been so painful. I am so thankful for you all. I'm thankful for the life that I was born into and for the love that we share. I'm excited to be together again and to build new memories as an even stronger family.
I love you dearly,
For my 33rd birthday, I invited my closest friends for a private jam session where we all shared our music and where I had an opportunity to share about the recent passing of my father and the impact that has had on my life and music career. The following recording is what was captured that night. Thank you for listening.